5 Pluses for Overnight Camp

Summer camps can be expensive and cut into precious summer family time, but there are pluses to consider as you decide if you should send your child to camp.

Nathan went to his first overnight camp this week away from family and friends, to Eastern Washington University for lacrosse camp. As I dropped him off I realized what a great growth opportunity it would be.

1) It gave him a chance to begin to  figure out who he is separate from mom and dad.

Instead of making decisions based on what mom and dad will think, he had to make decisions as to the kind of person he wanted those around him to see. He had to decide who he wanted to be, not just who mom and dad want him to be.

2) He had to take responsibility for himself.

No relying on parents or leaders to tell him what to do. Mom wasn't there every night to tell him to brush his teeth or take a shower. He had to choose what to have for dinner. He could buy soda instead of milk. He could sleep late or get up early to work out.

3) He was able to interact with boys his age without the safety net of parents.

Of course there were adults supervising, but the group of boys did not have parents near by. They had to figure out how they would treat each other and how to react to things like teasing or trouble makers.

4) He was able to play and work hard for himself.

Instead of working hard because mom and dad would be watching, he had to work hard because that's what he wanted to do. He could decide what activities to skip and which ones were important to him.

5) It gave me a chance to trust him.

By dropping him off and driving away it meant that I had to trust that he would make good decisions without me around. His decisions were his alone.

He had a fabulous time and camp. He learned a ton of new lacrosse skills, made some new friends, and came home with a glowing report from the coaches. I have no idea if he brushed his teeth or if he drank soda every night for dinner, but it was a week of growth for both of us.

What experiences have you had sending your kids to camp?

Parenting Dreams or Reality

A couple of weeks ago I found out that a friend is pregnant with her eighth child. My first reaction was the same one I am sure you are all having. WHAT? But then I decided to consider my reaction. And I realized that there must be a sliver of jealousy underneath my reaction. (I said sliver.)

I grew up in a family of six kids and I have always wanted to have a large family of my own. In fact, if you ask my husband, I wanted to have eight kids when we met, although I don't remember ever saying that.  When my oldest child was little, I ran a home daycare to bring in some extra money. As crazy and tiring as it was, I loved having the house full of noise and little active bodies. After having four children of our own, we decided our family was complete. But now, I have three children in my home and I wonder if I still had my four, would my home feel more complete than it does now?

Oh, the joys of having a new baby. I love being pregnant, it's such a great feeling to have a living being inside your body and to be nourishing and caring for it in all ways. To feel it move and hear a heartbeat never stops being a surreal experience.

Then the baby is born. He is so sweet and cuddly, and loud and demanding and frustrating and hard work. Wouldn't it be great to skip the infant and toddler stage? Couldn't we go straight to age 4 or 5?

 I love being able to interact with my child as a person instead of a needy entity that seems to never be satisfied. I admit that it's so much easier, when he says he is hungry, and I can send him to the kitchen to find food and when she cries I can send her to her room until she is ready to talk. I can carry on a conversation and teach them new skills. How fun to see them achieve new things and learn how to make decisions in a confusing world.

Would i want eight kids if I didn't have to deal with the infants and toddlers? I was blessed this week to have three extra boys at our house. We had six kids ages six to thirteen. The kids played together, worked together, and their imaginations ran wild. Would it be this fun if I did it 365 days a year?

I haven't talked to my friend about the choice to have a big family. I would love to hear her thoughts behind being a parent and the reasons they have decided to share their love with many children. I'm sure there are hurdles that must be crossed when you make a choice that most people would find disconcerting. Things like being the inspiration for a blog, for example. But it must bring some great blessings also.

Leave your comments about: Is your family small or large? What are the blessings and challenges? What is your favorite stage of childhood? Which ones you would rather skip?