I recently read an article with five suggestions to become a better parent. It was interesting, but none of the suggestions seemed new to me (except to have weekly daddy time, I thought that was cool). But it got me to thinking, what would I tell someone about how to be a better parent?
Here is it: Let your child be who she is.
My daughter is so different from me. At times she is a classic drama queen. She has actually thrown at me dramatically, "You don't know what it's like to be the middle child." (She says this with her hand on her forehead as if checking to make sure she's not going to faint.) And she's right, I don't know what it's like to be the middle child. I don't understand her propensity to melt into a puddle when something does not go her way. Even as a small child I would smile and say, "Well, she will be a good actress when she grows up. We all have our talents." I don't understand her mood swings or why things affect her so deeply.
Yet, this is who she is.
Her personality has allowed her to have a connection with horse riding that I don't understand. She is scared to ride, yet at the same time, she loves those horses with her whole soul. She won't give up.
She is sometimes so shy it hurts, yet her heart wants to help others. So she hosted a doll pageant recently to raise money for pediatric cancer. She just wanted to make a difference.
She started middle school this year and I was so concerned about her "thin skin" that I considered homeschooling her. Yet, she is doing great. Her sweet personality has attracted many new friends.
She decided to take piano lessons about 18 months ago. She came home from her lessons crying almost every week for the first year. "You can quit if you want. I don't care," told her, many times. "But I don't want to quit," she said. And she hasn't.
I have learned that she knows her own mind. If it were up to me, she would stop riding horses, be home schooled, take an acting class, and toughen up. But those are my choices, not hers. She is finding her own way in this world. And she seems to be doing a pretty darn good job of it.
It's like slipping on new socks
